I have spent the past 5 Valentine holidays alone. My relationships followed a blueprint. I would become enticed by a chocolate/mocha/caramel cutie in spring just as the weather warmed up and libidos were at an all time high, then as the Christmas holidays drew near I would turn into love’s scrooge as things dissolved. I wondered what I was doing wrong and why I deserved this treatment. I had no idea what I was doing to end up lonely on most Hallmark holidays.
I’ll admit Valentine’s Day usually triggers anxiety, as soon as the stores start filling their shelves with red, pink and hearts I do everything in my power to block them out but this year I’m excited.
Before I tell you why I’m excited, allow me to rewind back to Valentine’s Day 2012. Not only did I profess on this very blog that I was anti-Valentine day, I had come close to dissolving yet another relationship, I was feeling ambivalent about our future together because I hardly ever saw him due to his hectic work schedule (or so he says) but according to him if we chatted and text we were good- right! Mind you, the future had already been decided but like most women I held on for clarity and to see if the absence of moi would make the workaholic change his mind. Truth is I didn’t need clarity, I already had it, what I needed was to let him go and focus inward. So I decided that I was not going to stay inside and mope on Valentine’s Day, In fact on that day I was actually in great spirits with a lot of energy.
I went to yoga class and at the last minute decided to take myself out to dinner. We had Japanese food, me, myself and I. As I left yoga class one of best friends and now boyfriend, called me. I was shocked to hear from him and thought that perhaps he was about to ask me out on a pity date as he knew about what I was going through with the workaholic, but instead he was curious as to why I was spending the day alone, in fact he was baffled. Since I was occupied I kept the conversation short and proceeded to enjoy my dinner, little did I know we would end up together months later.
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article courtesy of HelloBeautiful.com
